House Review: GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra

As noted in the film's credits, GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra is based off of the Hasbro toy line. But much like its rival film, Transformers, you may as well credit the animated series and comic book for the characters' popularity. In fact, I'd wager that most people would remember the cartoon as the primary source of the characters.

As characters go, you already know the primaries. Despite the potential depth of both the Joe and Cobra teams, the on screen rosters consist mainly of the characters you have already heard about or seen. This is actually a good thing, as it lets the characters have some chance to have some focus.

The film itself has a relatively straightforward plot. When Conrad "Duke" Hauser (Channing Tatum) and his pal Ripcord (Marlon Wayans) are ambushed during a military escort mission, they stumble into a world of global terrorists and the specially trained force that combats them.

Okay, so that sounds really formal and all, but it's just a pretense for the heroes to fight the bad guys. Seriously, this film is not an intricately laid tale of espionage and intrigue (although there may be an odd twist or two tossed in at points). It is, at its core, an action adventure flick based around a toy line. In that respect, it does a decent enough job with storytelling.

That isn't to say that there aren't problems with the story. There are plot holes that you could drive a Mack truck through, and the only way you can truly enjoy the film is if you're capable of shutting off the part of your brain that asks sensible questions. Trying to wrap your head around why either team's base is built the way it is, for example, will melt your mind into pudding.

But to its credit, there does appear to be some work done to keep the story gelled. Some items are contrived, but they are at least contrived in a way that keeps the story elements together. There are points where both the hero and villain teams meet with partial success, and most of the primary characters have at least a few moments where they step out of their cookie cutter molds and become more than just generic toy soldiers.

Of course, I would be remiss if I didn't point out that no one character(s) truly stands out as an exceptional performance. Christopher Eccleston's performance as McCullen/Destro might have fit the bill if I wasn't constantly dragged under by his bonus deep accent. And while I wanted to like Tatum and his portrayal of Duke, I couldn't get past the notion of him being a "new" recruit, even if it was shown that he was an exceptional and experienced soldier. Dennis Quaid's Falcon was pretty solid, but lacked screen time (even if he actually had more scenes added to the film than he originally was supposed to... he was that good). And everyone else falls just above or below adequate.

I will note, though, that despite some people's apprehension, Marlon Wayans does put in a solid performance as Ripcord. Sure, he does get played for laughs at times, but you know going in that it was going to happen, and he still manages to give the character some heart. And despite being trapped in yet another masked/non-speaking role, Ray Park manages to breath life into Snake Eyes (who gets just enough action scenes in the film to satisfy any fan).

Aesthetically, the film... well, it is an action flick, right? Stuff blows up. It does get a bit effects crazy at times, but again (and let's beat this drum one more time) it's expected. There was a point where I started to wonder why they didn't just make the film completely in CGI for all the effects that were going on. And I swear, if I have to sit through one more shaky-cam action scene... We get it, Hollywood. Combat is chaotic. That doesn't mean that I want to have a seizure while watching one.

And speaking of the fighting... yikes. I remember saying that the violence level of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen was disturbingly high, and while this film may do a little better, there are still some rather rough moments along the way. And not just a "no parachutes" kind of rough. The fact that a certain Joe seemed to have a preoccupation with headshots (even if the end results were conveniently masked most of the time) might be a little unsettling for the younger crowd.

All in all, you'll take from the film what you put into it. If you want to trash it and pick it apart, there is more than enough fodder for you to pick at. If you can sit around and enjoy a little mindless summer popcorn flick, then you could do worse than checking out GI Joe.

Overall Rating (out of 10): 5.5 (Just average, but it gets a slight bump for having to deal with being an origin flick.)